” This kind of sh** only happens to me” – like trying to push open a door that clearly says PULL. Or writing down your childhood phone number on an application form.
Today let’s list your top ten mishaps and help me feel better about my own clumsiness!”
Now this is an area that I really excel at so the list was very easy.
1. A few years ago we hired a lovely little cottage in Portknockie (Scotland), and a few days in I fell from the top of the stairs to the bottom. Thankfully my (very padded) bottom took most of the brunt, but I had some spectacular bruises for a while.
2. One year when we were in Tasmania we went for a day out to Strahan on the west coast so that I could show Ken around. We parked the car, got out, and a few seconds later I tripped over a bollard and skidded across the tarmac on my hands and knees. So the main part of the town that Ken got to see was the tourist information centre where they had a first aid kit and my beloved patched me up. It was very painful.
3. Two years ago at work I missed the step about three from the bottom of the stairs and ended up sprawled across the floor in front of several centre visitors who were there to get support from me. I tore my trousers, took skin off my knees, and felt very embarrassed.
4. When I lived in Sydney, I tripped over my nephew’s baby gate, landing very heavily and stylishly on my knees. Actually it’s a wonder my knees still function with the amount of times I’ve abused them.
5. Last year as I was getting out of the shower I had a very spectacular fall, ended up in Accident and Emergency, and had to have three weeks off work due to torn ligaments in my leg and wrist.
6. One night in the nurses home when I was a student nurse we were attempting to put one of my friends in the bath fully clothed (we were a little crazy). Our first thought was to put her in the bath and turn on the shower, but when the shower didn’t work, we put the plug in the bath and turned the taps on. Anyway, after we’d finished our shenanigans we all went to bed, and unbeknown to us the shower decided to come on during the night and the plug was still in the bath!!! We awoke to a very flooded third floor and some had leaked down to the second floor. The hospital had to get big industrial fans in to try and dry the place out and we had to live with the wet smell for ages. We also had to come up with a plausible explanation for the flood that didn’t implicate any of us – I think we managed it.
7. When I was at primary school, for the school evening for the parents, my class was doing a gymnastics demonstration. I was meant to run, jump on the trampet, and then do a perfectly executed somersault over the vault. Instead, I ran, jumped on the trampet and then decided to sit on the vault before getting off and running off stage very quickly.
8. I am the person who asks the blind man if he saw something!!
9. I am the nurse who has had to go through the contents of a rubbish skip to find a pair of false teeth that had been thrown out with some rubbish. (I did find them so that made the stinkyness worthwhile).
And the pièce de résistance of my mishaps:
10. I am also the nurse who was trying to take an unconscious persons false teeth out, tugging on them very strongly, when the family walked in and asked me what I was doing as the lady had all her own teeth.
There you have it, just a few of my mishaps and clumsiness over the years – I could probably do a top 100 with lots of them being from my over 30 years as a nurse.
Before you go make sure you hop over to Tamara’s Blog
and see what my fellow bloggers have come up with for their list.
Until next time, be good, stay safe, and I hope everything is going well in your world.
Pamela & Ken